


Everything else is happening today, might as well get rid of my abusive dad for good on top of it

by KungFuCutBug, madface7, wingedcatgirl



Category: The Murderverse
Genre: Body Swap, Gen, Hypnosis, Multiplicity/Plurality, Possession, cw: villain who hates queer people and uses slurs on purpose, exported from discord. by hand., probably more tags idk lmao, script/chatlog format, transgender coming-out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:01:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28499466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KungFuCutBug/pseuds/KungFuCutBug, https://archiveofourown.org/users/madface7/pseuds/madface7, https://archiveofourown.org/users/wingedcatgirl/pseuds/wingedcatgirl
Summary: A reformed serial killer has something to show to their paladin chef boyfriend. A French dude, a computer virus, and a catgirl hive-mind are also hanging around for moral support, which turns out to be a very good thing when abusive ghost dad rears his ugly head, and they decide to make this the last time he bothers his child again.
Relationships: Stew / Jocelyn (Murderverse)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	Everything else is happening today, might as well get rid of my abusive dad for good on top of it

**Author's Note:**

> ... Well, we've never crossposted Discord roleplay to AO3 before, so we took our best guess as to how the tagging conventions work with that. (We do intend to write Murderverse fic on our own at some point.)
> 
> Co-author credit to Mad (Stew, Jonas) and Cutbug (Hercules, Metabomb), who I will formally add as co-authors just as soon as I learn their AO3 usernames.
> 
> -Sylvi& wingedcatgirl🐱

**Jonas:** Well, I'm glad that conversation's over.

 **Hercules:** Oui, I’m glad our issues have been resolved...

 **Jonas** : Well, uh... I kinda want Stew's opinion on something... so... I think you should leave...

 **Stew** : No, Jonas, let him stay. You've got nothing to be afraid of.

 **Jonas** : it's embarrassing...

 **Stew** : It's not embarrassing. Whatever it is, it's not.

 **Sylvi** : ... Should we leave too? Or are we sufficiently unobtrusive?

 **Stew** : You can also stay.

 **Jonas** : ...you can stay, Sylvi.

...and, I guess Hercules can too.

 **Hercules** : You’re fine, Sylvi.

 **Jonas** : OK, I guess I can...

I'm gonna leave, and I want you to tell me what you think of... something...

 **Hercules** : Compris. Sounds easy enough.

 **Jonas** : _[leaves room]_

 **Stew** : I hope this is what I think it is...

 **Jonas** : _[comes back in a goth dress and a cat ear headband]_

 **Stew** : It is what I think it is and you look so cute!!!

_[hugs]_

**Hercules** : !

Merde, you look fabulous!

 **Jonas** : _[blushing]_ Th-... thanks... _[smiles a bit]_

 **Sylvi** : _[smiles]_ Very cute.

 **Jonas** : I like... I like this a lot. I don't know why I'm so embarrassed...

 **Hercules** : If I had to guess, probably for the same reason I was so embarrassed about the hypnosis thing.

But if you won’t judge me for that, I won’t judge you for this. Besides, the look suits you. Especially that headband. Très adorable!

 **Sylvi** : It's a very cute headband indeed. _[ear wiggles]_

 **Jonas** : It's for a different reason.

I just like dressing like a woman, and... being a woman.

That's about it. _[blush]_

 **Hercules** : Oh!

Well, that’s perfectly acceptable! Nothing to be embarrassed about. Although, I can see why you would be...

 **Jonas** : I mean, uh...

I just... I'm not used to compliments like this. _[Jonas is speaking in a slightly higher pitch.]_

 **Hercules** : ...I don’t know how to respond to that, other than habituez-vous à cela.

 **Jonas** : ...what does that mean?

 **Stew** : "Get used to it."

 **Jonas** : ... _[smiles a bit]_

 **Hercules** : _[also smiles]_

 **Jonas** : Heh. I should probably start using makeup...

Maybe I could disguise as a different person.

 **Hercules** : Is it a disguise, though? Or is it simply you finding out who you really are?

...Merde, that came out weirdly. Désolé. What I’m trying to say is, do what makes you happy.

That’s... what I did. _[wink]_

 **Jonas** : !

 **Sylvi** : Same.

 **Jonas** : Wait, you're...?

 **Stew** : This is news to me...

 **Hercules** : _[nods]_ It took a lot of help from Dr. Michi, but here we are.

 **Jonas** : Wow...

I...

I had no idea.

 **Hercules** : ...I’ll take that as a compliment.

 **Jonas** : It was.

I...

I wish I could...

I'm sorry, I just... can't put it into words.

 **Hercules** : It’s alright.

 **Stew** : Is it too late to say "Congrats, Hercules"?

 **Hercules** : Pfft, of course not! Merci!

 **Jonas** : ...congrats!

 **Sylvi** : Congrats, Hercules. And congrats to you as well, Jo.

 **Jonas** : I just admire how... comfortable you are. You, Sylvi, and... well, I don't know about anyone else...

 **Hercules** : _[smiling]_

 **Jonas** : I still don't know if I want to change my name, or if I want to fully transition...

 **Hercules** : Well, just play around for a bit and see what makes you the happiest. I’ve heard of some people who aren’t satisfied with staying as one gender and just... sort of shift from time to time.

 **Jonas** : Huh. That might be an option...

 **Hercules** : Again, do what makes you happy. I know I’m not the greatest advice-giver, but...

 **Jonas** : I don't know what makes me happy. This makes me kinda happy... but I still feel...

I mean, this happiness isn't permanent.

 **Hercules** : Hmm...

_[starts absentmindedly twiddling his mustache, apparently lost in thought]_

**Jonas** : I don't know if this will make me happy.

I just... what if I do this, and I regret it?

What if this is all wrong?

 **Hercules** : You’d know if it’s wrong. And if it is, then... just...

Again, the gender-shifting thing is an option. I’m... sorry, I’m kinda bad at giving advice...

 **Sylvi** : If it's wrong, you can do a different thing.

 **Jonas** : Like what? I can't be happy. I'm never happy. Everything I try makes it a little better, but....

_[He starts crying.]_

**Sylvi** : _(Oh no. I don't know how to handle crying people.)_

_[tentatively walks over to Jonas and pats his head]_

**Hercules** : _[suddenly tenses up considerably for no discernible reason]_

 **Stew** : _[hugs Jonas]_

 **Hercules** : _[looks in the direction of the time cube and mutters]_ (J'ai senti un étrange frisson dans le vent venant de cette direction...)

...

 **Jonas** : I can't fucking escape...

 **Hercules** : _[sits down on the floor]_

 **Jonas** : He won't ever fucking leave my mind...

 **Hercules** : ...he?

 **Jonas** : If I do this, his voice in my head is just gonna scream even louder...

 **Stew** : ...I assume he's talking about his father.

 **Hercules** : ...

 **Sylvi** : _[frowns]_

_(Have we handled anything like this in our many, many adventures?)_

**Anabiel** : _(Not that I can recall.)_

 **Jonas** : If I don't do this, I won't feel content.

 **Hercules** : Do what?

 **Jonas** : If I don't accept that I want to be a woman...

I don't know.

When I put on this dress, and these ears... I just hear my dad, screaming louder and louder... "You're not my son! You're not even my daughter! You're pathetic!"

_[Saying that made him tear up a lot more.]_

**Hercules** : ...

...I... genuinely cannot respond to that. I’m... so sorry...

 **Jonas** : ...

 **Stew** : _[hugs Jo tighter]_

 **Jonas** : At least my switch makes it go away. That's the only thing that makes him quiet down.

 **Hercules** : That’s good... At least you have something...

 **Stew** : ...that gives me an idea.

 **Hercules** : ...eh?

 **Jonas** : ...? _[Jonas looks at Stew inquisitively.]_

 **Stew** : I mean, maybe we could use hypnosis to quiet your dad down.

 **Jonas** : ...

...I know this is going to sound crazy, but... for some reason, I can't accept that.

 **Hercules** : ...I mean, I’m still kind of wary, but... it worked for dealing with “Pirate”..

It couldn’t hurt.

 **Stew** : It's fine if he feels uncomfortable getting hypnotized.

 **Jonas** : ...

...it has nothing to do with hypnosis. I just...

I'm scared to even try to get rid of him.

 **Hercules** : As long as Stew doesn’t attempt to brainwash you into becoming his—

...? Why do you say that?

 **Jonas** : I don't know.

 **Hercules** : I’d think it would be liberating to get that annoying voice out of your head. It certainly was for me and “Pirate”...

 **Jonas** : I can't.

 **Hercules** : Why not?

 **Jonas** : I don't know.

He's just getting louder and louder... and he's yelling at me, and crying....

Like he'd usually do... he'd yell at me, then cry and blame all of his problems on me...

 **Hercules** : ...c'est ça... Of course he doesn’t want you to get rid of him.

 **Jonas** : I know.

 **Hercules** : But if he’s actively harming you, you don’t really have a choice but to get rid of him if you want to improve.

 **Jonas** : I can't. What if it doesn't work? What if he comes back somehow...?

I'd never hear the end of it...

 **Hercules** : It worked for me, Jonas—err, whatever you want me to call you—I’m sure it’ll work for you. Please, we have to get rid of him somehow.

Otherwise, _[starts slowly raising his hand]_ every time you want to become a better person...

 _[abruptly slams his arm back at his side]_ He’ll drag you right back down with him.

 **Jonas** : He's already dragged me down, Hercules. I think he's dragged me down to far to ever resurface.

 **Hercules** : WE’RE TRYING TO PULL YOU OUT.

 **Jonas** : I can't.

 **Stew** : _[whispers to Hercules]_ Should I just... trance him...?

 **Hercules** : _[whispers back]_ It looks like you don’t have much of a choice...

 **Jonas** : I see you two whispering.

I'm not stupid.

 **Stew** : Jonas, I'm sorry.

 **Jonas** : Stew, do NOT do it.

DON'T DO IT.

DADDY'S GONNA GET ANGRY, STEW. DON'T. _[He's crying with a look of fearful anger on his face.]_

 **Hercules** : Je suis désolé. But we have to.

 **Stew** : Jonas... _[Stew casts Command.]_ Trance.

 **Jonas** : No, ple-

_[slumps over]_

**Hercules** : ... _[crosses arms]_ I know this is for the better good, but... It still feels... wrong, somehow.

 **Sylvi** : _[shaking, fists clenched]_

... Get that apparition out of her so I can _tear it to pieces_.

 **Jonas** : ... _[stands up]_

 **Stew** : ...?

 **Hercules** : It shoul—oh merde.

 **Jonas** : You. _[pins Stew to the wall]_

 **Hercules** : _[frantically hides behind Sylvi]_

 **Stew** : ACK-

_[SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT]_

**Sylvi** : _Break._

 **Combat Log** : Sylvi casts Break.

Jonas? suffers the effect of Break.

 **Hercules** : Merde, que se passe-t-il?! Est-ce que ça va, Stew?!

 **Stew** : _[croaking]_ Thanks, Sylvi, that REALLY HELPS. But, news flash, I'm STILL PINNED TO THE WALL. _[cough]_ Hard to breathe...

 **Combat Log** : Sylvi uses Sticky Tongue.

 **Stew** : uuuuugh....

_[falls to the floor]_

**Sylvi** : _[casts Regen on Stew]_

 **Stew** : ...

 **Hercules** : _[scrambles away from Sylvi following the Sticky Tongue]_

 **Stew** : ...Is there a way to keep him still, but let him talk?

 **Hercules** : J'ai trop peur pour approcher... cette personne. Je ne sais pas qui ils sont, mais ce ne sont pas Jonas.

 **Stew** : _[Stew rolls up his sleeves.]_ Because I have some choice words for Jonas' father.

 **Sylvi** : Possibly. He'll wiggle out of that stone soon enough, but I think I can keep him stuck with other binding spells.

... Blue magic can be really gross sometimes.

 **Jonas** : ...

 **Hercules** : Attendez, il peut échapper à ça?! Merde... _[shuddering like a leaf]_

 **Jonas** : _[cracks open the top of the stone, bleeding]_

 **Hercules** : _[shrieks]_

 **Jonas** : You can't get rid of me that easily.

 **Sylvi** : _[casts an orb of water at "Jonas"]_

 **Combat Log** : Sylvi uses Fluid Aura.

Jonas(?) suffers the effect of Bind.

 **Jonas** : Ugh.

You can't keep me trapped in here for long.

 **Stew** : Get the FUCK out.

 **Hercules** : Va-t-en, va-t-en, va-t-en, va-t-en— _[crawls backwards up against the wall, looking at “Jonas” with a genuinely fearful expression]_

 **Sylvi** : I have an abundance of methods to keep you trapped until Stew can banish you properly.

Or you could be nice and leave your child's head of your own accord.

 **Jonas** : _[He glares at Stew.]_ I hate you most of all. You faggy asshole, turning my boy into a sissy.

 **Stew** : GET. OUT. OF. HER.

 **Jonas** : He is NOT my daughter. Hell, he's not even my son. He's just a stupid son of a bitch who we should have been rid of twenty-four fucking years ago.

 **Hercules** : Stew! Comment nous sommes-nous débarrassés de "Pirate"?! Je ne me souviens plus! Je suis trop stressé pour penser clairement....!

 **Sylvi** : Then rid yourself of them. Leave your child's body. Quit lingering somewhere you hate.

 **Jonas** : Why should I? I'm dead anyway. I have nowhere else to go. And someone has to teach him a lesson or two about life.

For one thing, men don't cry.

 **Stew** : _[crying]_

 **Sylvi** : ... Y'know, if you weren't currently using your child as a human shield, I could prove you wrong in an instant.

 **Hercules** : _[also crying]_ J-Je... ngaaaaAAAAAAAAH!

 **Jonas** : Heh. Goes to show that you're not a real man, Frenchie.

You never will be. And Jonas... will never be a real woman.

 **Sylvi** : Don't bet on it.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[eyes flash red]_ YOU.

 **Jonas** : Are you talking back to me?

I can end things for both of you right here.

 **Sylvi** : Yes. What are you going to do about it? Cry?

You have no idea who you're dealing with. The _least_ of us is a terror beyond your imagination.

 **Jonas** : I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I can kill Jonas. I can drop him dead, right now. Would that make you happy?

 **Hercules (Infected)** : You’re the bastard that Jonas thought I was for all that time, aren’t you? You’re his precious “daddy”, right?

 **Jonas** : Oh, yes, I remember you.

 **Sylvi** : And how, precisely, do you propose to do that?

 **Hercules (Infected)** : You think you can kill them? The headmistress won’t allow it.

 **Sylvi** : Never mind the headmistress, _I_ won't.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : Every time you try to kill someone... she’ll bring her back.

 **Jonas** : Ha!

 **Hercules (Infected)** : Or him, or them, or—whatever.

 **Jonas** : Haha!

[He starts laughing maniacally.]

 **Hercules (Infected)** : WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING?! YOU BITCH!

 **Jonas** : You think some woman, some tranny, and some PUSSY who couldn't finish its own PLANS can get rid of me.

I'm tied to my son. If I go, he goes. And I've no plans to leave this body.

Oh, wait, no. Two trannies.

 **Sylvi** : Enough.

_[she summons a cloud of pink smoke]_

You will leave your child's body, one way or another.

 **Combat Log** : Sylvi uses Holmgang+

Sylvi gains the effect of Holmgang+

Jonas(?) suffers the effect of Holmgang+

Sylvi uses Cover+

Jonas gains the effect of Covered.

 **Jonas** : I can't leave. He's tried so much to get rid of me. And he can't.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : ... _[Shit. Does that mean the tactic we used on Pirate won’t work?]_

 **Stew** : You... fucking... ASSHOLE. You couldn't take care of your own daught-

 **Jonas** : He's NOT my DAUGHTER.

 **Sylvi** : Obviously. Jo isn't anything to you. You have no claim here. So FUCK OFF.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[If we were to entrance Hercules and try to swap his body with Jonas’s father... Would Jonas appear in Hercules’s body too?]_

 **Jonas** : Jonas isn't anything. Not just to me. He's pathetic. A worthless runt that I should have done away with.

And he caused me to kill my own wife.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : How the fuck was that her fault?!

 **Jonas** : HIS fault. It was HIS fault.

 **Sylvi** : Well, you see, this piece of sentient trash here is incapable of taking responsibility for his own actions, and had to stoop to blaming it on a child.

Like a weakling.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : Of course.

 **Jonas** : Said the weakling.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : You shut the fuck up right now.

 **Jonas** : You want everything handed to you on a silver platter, don't you.

 **Sylvi** : You get out of your child's body and I'll show you how weak I am.

 **Jonas** : I ain't leaving.

I'm staying right here.

 **Sylvi** : Because you're pathetic. You _can't_ leave, can you? You're too weak!

 **Jonas** : You have no right talking back to me, young man.

 **Sylvi** : I don't know who you're talking to.

 **Jonas** : YOU.

 **Sylvi** : Nope, doesn't ring a bell.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : If you won’t leave on your own volition... _[inhales]_ Then we will force you out.

Stew! We need to find someone to swap Jonas’s father into so we can deal with him!

I’m worried Jonas will appear in the swapped body as well, but... We have to do something!

 **Jonas** : Oh, you're such a snowflake. You want everything to go exactly your way. Waah, waah, waah. I wanna be a girl. I wanna kiss guys. I wanna do this, or that. In this world, you get what you get, and you don't throw a fit like a little bastard.

 **Stew** : _[frozen in fear and anger]_

 **Sylvi** : Oh, you get what you get, all right. Swap him into me.

 **Stew** : I... I can't believe my own girlfriend...

 **Jonas** : Hehe. Hahaha. HAHAHAHAHA. _[He starts laughing even more.]_

 **Hercules (Infected)** : ...Are you sure, Sylvi!?

 **Sylvi** : Absolutely.

 **Stew** : Alright, Sylvi, _[Stew casts Command.]_ T-trance...

 **Combat Log** : Sylvi suffers the effect of Entranced.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : Please work, please work, please work...

 **Stew** : Sylvi and Jonas' dad... swap bodies. Please work...

 **Jonas** : ...

 **Stew** : ...

 **Hercules (Infected)** : ...

 **Jonas' Dad in Sylvi's body** : What, you think putting me into this thing is going to help you at all?

 **Hercules (Infected)** : ...It has to.

 **Sylvi in Jonas's body** : Definitely.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[closes eyes and concentrates for a moment]_

 **Sylvi in Jonas's body** : _(Hey, Jonas, you still in here?)_

 **Jonas' Dad in Sylvi's body** : Well, who's laughing now? You're the one frozen solid.

 **Jonas** : _[...]_

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[eventually summons a syringe filled with a weird liquid and staggers]_

 **Jonas' Dad in Sylvi's body** : You're all the same. You're idiots.

 **Sylvi in Jonas's body** : Not quite.

 **Jonas** : _[I'm here...]_

 **Sylvi in Jonas's body** : _(Oh, good. Just checking. Hang tight. We've got this.)_

 **Hercules (Infected)** : You won’t be moving for long, you... you BASTARD! _[lunges at “Sylvi” (Jonas’s dad) with the syringe]_

 **Jonas' Dad in Sylvi's body** : Heh.... you're all so... you're...

You can't get rid of...

You... _[slumps over]_

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[pushes it in as hard as they can]_

 **Anabiel** : _(Don't think you'll be running off anywhere.)_

 **Jonas' Dad in Sylvi's body** : ...

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[tears it out of “Sylvi’s” neck]_ Sorry, other S-mates... but it had to be done...

 **Jonas' Dad in Sylvi's body** : Fuck you, Jonas...

 **Sylvi in Jonas's body** : Unlikely.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[stabs it into “Sylvi’s” neck again]_

 **Jonas' Dad in Sylvi's body:** ...

...

 **Hercules (Infected)** : ...

 **Jonas** : _[I think you did it...]_

 **Hercules (Infected)** : ... _[tears the needle out again]_

 **Robin** : _(I have no idea how I'm physically doing this, but I **am** shoving this fucker directly into the path of the chemicals.)_

 **Anabiel** : _(You're outnumbered, even in here, "daddy".)_

 **Jonas' Dad in Sylvi's body** : _(Oh. Haha. You are crazy. You're a piece of... you're..........................)_

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[tosses the syringe at the wall, causing the glass to shatter everywhere]_

I... I haven’t felt this angered and hateful since Cutbug perished at that bastard’s carnival...

 **Jonas' Dad in Sylvi's body** : _(...)_

 **Anabiel** : _(Hypocritical to the very end, I see.)_

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[breathing heavily with tightly clenched fists]_

 **Anabiel** : ... I think he's gone.

 **Stew** : _[hugs Sylvi!Jonas]_

...oh, right, you're not...

... _[hugs tighter]_

 **Sylvi in Jonas's body** : _[hugs]_

No, but you needed the hug anyway.

 **Stew** : I couldn't protect my own girlfriend...

 **Anabiel** : _(Oi. "Daddy". Anything left of you?)_

 **Sylvi in Jonas's body** : Uh, Stew, what precisely do you think you _just_ finished doing?

 **Stew** : ...I could have done that earlier.

I could have said that the minute shit went down.

But I just froze...

 **Sylvi in Jonas's body** : Oh, linear time. You did it in the end.

 **Jonas** : _[...can you leave my body now...? I want to talk to Stew...]_

 **Sylvi in Jonas's body** : Ah, right. We should switch back, now. Or, well. I should go back. Nothing left for me to switch with, right Ana?

 **Anabiel** : Near as we can tell...

 **Stew** : Right, um... Sylvi, you're back in your own body again...

 **Jonas** : _[slumps back over and falls entranced again]_

 **Sylvi** : _[shakes head]_

Wow. That was an experience and a half.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : ...Jonas? Are you there?

 **Jonas** : @_@

 **Stew** : ...right, she's still...

 **Combat Log** : combat over effects removed etc etc you know

 **Stew** : Jo, I want you to never, ever, let your dad back into your brain. And I want you to be happy with who you are as a person. Nod if you understand.

 **Jonas** : _[nods]_

 **Stew** : Alright then. _[Stew casts Command.]_ Normalize.

 **Jonas** : _[blinks, wakes up]_

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[finally seems to have calmed down]_

 **Jonas** : _[stands up and hugs Stew as tightly as she can]_

 **Stew** : _[hugs back and starts to cry]_

 **Jonas** : _[also cries]_

 **Sylvi** : _[takes a deep breath and exhales]_

Glad he didn't try fighting back while in my body... of course we had a plan to handle it if he did, but still, it could've been bad.

_[looks at her hands, flexing her fingers]_

... I find myself wondering who can use my magic when I'm body-swapped.

A question for later, I suppose.

 **Hercules (Infected)** : _[sits down on the floor again and groans]_

 **Jonas** : I wish my dad wasn't so shitty...

 **Metabomb** : _[appears standing behind Hercules, slouching slightly, with closed eyes and clenched fists]_

 **Hercules** : _[slumps over slightly, groaning again]_

 **Sylvi** : _[sits on the floor, idly rubbing the syringe wound on her neck]_

_(Everyone who's supposed to be here okay after all that?)_

**Anabiel** : _(All present and/or accounted for. Heal that.)_

 **Sylvi** : Oh, right.

 **Combat Log** : Sylvi uses Afflatus Rapture.

Everyone recovers HP.

 **Jonas** : ...

 **Hercules** : ...Est-ce fini?

 **Metabomb** : _[unclenches fists and opens eyes, looking at Hercules]_ It’s over.

 **Jonas** : Thanks, Stew... I love you so much...

 **Stew** : I love you too, Jo... _[They both slowly kiss]_

 **Metabomb** : _[looks up at Stew and Jonas and smiles slightly]_

 **Hercules** : _(Are we supposed to see this?)_

 **Metabomb** : _(I’m sure they’re fine with it.)_

 **Jonas** : _[breaks off]_

 **Sylvi** : _[smiles for the happy couple]_

 **Jonas** : ...Fuck, I wish I had a father figure. Just someone to look up to...

...would it be weird if I saw Stew as a father figure of sorts, even though we're... dating?

 **Metabomb** : I wouldn’t think so, no. Unless you take it to... extreme levels.

 **Jonas** : Um... no.

 **Stew** : Yeah, I would not be OK with that.

 **Robin** : I'm your dad now.

 **Sylvi** : Robin, do I need to explain all the reasons that doesn't make sense?

 **Metabomb** : Just... I never want to hear the word “daddy” again after that. _[shakes head]_

 **Jonas** : ...actually, having a gay catboy dad might be nice.

 **Sylvi** : ... Well, sure. We know nothing about parenting, but even that would be an improvement from the previous state of affairs.

 **Jonas** : I wasn't saying I want him to be my dad...

But, I mean, I wouldn't be mad about i- look, this is getting confusing.

 **Hercules** : _[still kinda out of it]_ It’s not like... her father... knew anything... about parenting, either...

 **Sylvi** : Oh, sure. All he knows is be authoritarian, rant, hate people and lie.

Knew, rather.

 **Jonas** : I just want to be a cute emo girl, is all. I can have father figures, but no more fathers for me, to be honest...

...but that still leaves me without my mom.

...

 **Metabomb** : ...

 **Jonas** : ...well...

...I'm sorry. I'm bringing down the mood.

More than it already is down.

 **Sylvi** : Pff. You think this is a _down_ mood? We just got rid of an abusive parent once and for all. We're... well, we _would_ be celebrating, if we weren't exhausted.

 **Metabomb** : Right, I... should have warned you about the after effects of that syringe... Sorry.

 **Sylvi** : No worries.

 **Metabomb** : _[rubs the left side of their neck, pensive]_

 **Jonas** : ...well, I mean, I kinda saw Yui as...

 **Metabomb** : Yui’s gone.

 **Jonas** : I know...

 **Metabomb** : You were there with me when I...

 **Jonas** : I was there.

 **Metabomb** : Right.

 **Jonas** : Unlike Claire, Yui did have some moments where she seemed... human. And sane. I just...

I don't know...

 **Stew** : ...

Jo, if it's any consolation, if you need a shoulder to cry on, I'm here for you. Don't be afraid to let it out. I love you.

 **Jonas** : ............... _[looks at Stew and immediately bursts into tears]_

 **Metabomb** : Right. And if you need to talk someone’s ear off... I’m a good listener, if nothing else.

 **Hercules** : Hey.

 **Metabomb** : You’re the one who said it first about me, Herc.

 **Stew** : Yeah. Hercules and Metabomb are really easy to talk to.

_[starts to tear up a little as well]_

**Jonas** : ...

_[Her tears of sadness have gone away. She's smiling widely and crying a river.]_

I love you. I love all of you.

I love how much you care about me. I love that you're willing to look out for me.

I can't put it into words.

You guys make my life worth living. Especially you, Stew. _[She kisses Stew again.]_

 **Metabomb** : ...

... _[starts to tear up as well]_ I... do...?

 **Jonas** : _[breaks off and looks at Meta]_

Of course you do...

You... you've really helped me out. A lot.

 **Metabomb** : I h-have?

 **Jonas** : _[hugs Meta and buries face into their chest]_

Yes.

 **Sylvi** : You're one of the most helpful people around here, Meta.

 **Metabomb** : _[hugs Jocelyn back and and cries with a giant smile on their face]_

 **Stew** : Of course she feels this way. You have a good head on your shoulders, Meta. You're the most sane out of... well, our group of weirdos.

 **Metabomb** : If you genuinely believe I’m the most sane out of all of us, then... You aren’t giving yourselves enough credit.

 **Stew** : ...I might not be giving us enough credit, but you're just good at helping us.

 **Jocelyn** : Thank you, Meta...

 **Metabomb** : ...

...You’re welcome.

 **Stew** : Well, how about we end this the way we always end these things.

 **Jocelyn** : ...?

 **Hercules** : Ah?

 **Metabomb** : ...What do you mean by “the way we always end these things”?

 **Stew** : We switch on and hug it out. As usual.

 **Metabomb** : ...None of the S-mates have a switch, though.

 **Hercules** : That doesn’t mean they can’t join the hugs anyway.

 **Sylvi** : I don't have a switch, but I'll hug anyone.

 **Hercules** : See?

 **Jocelyn** : Alright, sure, whatever. I'm fine with that. _[switches on]_

 **Stew** : _[also switches on and instantly hugs Jocelyn]_

 **Metabomb** : ...You know... I’m actually feeling quite happy already. I don’t think I’ll need to switch for thi—

 **Hercules** : _[switches and bearhugs Meta]_

 **Metabomb** : GACK! Tight... tight...!

 **Sylvi** : _[hugs all of y'all]_

 **Jocelyn** : _[buries face in Stew's chest]_

 **Stew** : _[ruffles Jocelyn's hair]_

 **Timeline Master Mad** : wow this is awfully familiar

i will not, however, lock this time cube forever

**Author's Note:**

> If this world and/or these characters intrigue you, do check out [the roleplay from which they originate](https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=16034171540A38111800).
> 
> (🐱: This is the same Sylvi Elakha as in [my FFXIV fic series](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1906687), if you're into FFXIV in particular. Not attaching this fic to that series at this time, on account of I want to reserve the ability to attach it to a Murderverse-centric series instead.)


End file.
